literature

No Coming Back (Sollux x Reader)

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remembertheginger
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"(f/n)," Sollux's voice tugs at your ear, waking you from your sleep. "Equiuth ith done."

You sleepily blink your eyes open, trying to understand what he's saying. Equius is done. With what...? "Five more minutes," you groan, flipping over and trying not to sink through the couch.

"(f/n)," the psionic snaps, blue and red sparks sitting you upright. How those powers work on a ghost, you're not exactly sure, but they work nonetheless. "It'th four in the morning, it'th almotht time to wake up anyway. Get up, dammit, don't you want a body?"

Struggling to free yourself, you answer, "Sollux, let me go! I'm awake now!" The energy releases you and you sigh, floating up to a standing position. "Fine, let's go, then." You phase through the door, waiting for Sollux as he opens it then exits, closing it again with a sigh.

The walk to Equius's is passed in nervous, anticipating silence as you begin to think about what it'll be like. No more walking through walls, for one. But maybe you'll finally be able to feel the way you used to, rather than this dull almost-feeling you're used to. The faintest flickers of the love you once felt, memories that still seem so far away.

Finally, you reach his hive, simply floating through the door. Equius is nowhere to be seen, but Sollux rings the doorbell, causing him to come from his workshop. He sees you and looks a bit shocked, opening the door for Sollux. "Come in, come in..."

He leads the two of you to his workshop, where your new, metallic body stands ready for you. It looks exactly like you did, only... silver. There's blue paint on it--- oh, damn, that's right. Equius had to use his own blood... geez, this makes you feel kind of bad.

"Go on," Sollux nudges you, giving you a quick kiss on the cheek. "Thee you on the other thide."

Both he and Equius watch as you apprehensively float towards it; when you make contact, you give a little shiver. Being inside is strange. You lift an arm to test it out.

"(f/n)?" Sollux frowns. "You tethting it out?"

"Yeah," you answer. It doesn't look like the arm moved with you... you attempt to walk. Nothing. "But nothing's happening..."

Equius has begun to sweat, darting out of the room to find a towel. Sollux sighs. "Why don't you come out and we'll athk Equiuth what'th wrong?"

You begin to float out but stop as total numbness encompasses you. Eyes widening, you float back into the robot, where you aren't beginning to not exist. "S-Sollux? If I come out, I don't know that I'll be coming back."

He runs a hand through his hair, taking a deep breath. "What do you mean? Jutht come out and we'll figure it out."

"If I come out, I'll fade," you bite your lip. "If I stay in here, I can't do anything, I have to stay perfectly still, which I can't do."

Rubbing his eyes behind his glasses, Sollux is clearly torn. "Jutht wait until Equiuth getth back. We can athk him why it worked for Aradia but not you. Okay? Thtay calm." It almost sounds like he's telling it more to himself than to you.

At that moment, the blue-blood reappears. "I have a theory that you may not like."

"Thpill it, Thahak," Sollux snaps, definitely fed up with this shit. He just wants you back, wants you all to himself.

"Aradia was already prototyped when she entered the robot," he explains. "Additionally, she has her telekinetic powers. I believe the prototyping is what allowed her to maintain control of the machine."

Sollux swears viciously, showing his overexposure to Karkat. "Equiuth, leave," he commands, not a trace of doubt in his voice. Equius bows a bit before exiting the room to who knows where.

You attempt to put your hands to your mouth, only to feel that numbing sensation, and quickly bring them back to their positions by your sides. "Sollux, I'm scared," you whisper, pursing your lips. "I-I thought this was going to work."

"We'll make it work," the mustard-blood promises, coming close to you and kissing your lips--- or rather, the robot's. "You'll thee."

"I don't want to stay in this robot forever," you can feel yourself beginning to tear up. "I don't want to have these shadows of emotions forever."

"(f/n), don't," Sollux's eyes widen as faint yellow begins to trail out of his eyes, down his skin. "Thtop, pleathe, we'll figure it out!"

You float out of the robot, out through Sollux, and he shudders when you pass through him. Immediately the numbness starts to overcome you. "I love you, Sollux Captor," you smile, back to back with you unable to see him and him unable to see you.

The room fades into a sort of clear color--- nothing. There is nothing, and you are nothing. There's no coming back this time. You are gone, nothing can bring you back.

Sollux is a fool for having thought it could have worked. Sobbing, tears now streaming down his face, he goes to Eridan's hive; the door flies off its hinges as his psionics take over, grabbing the troll off his couch. "It'th your fault!" He screams, throwing Eridan against the wall. "It'th all your fault, you bathtard, you made me kill her and now the'th gone forever!"

Eridan pulls himself back to standing, a confused rage decorating his face. "What the ever-flushing fuck are you talking about, Captor?"

"Go die!" Sollux shrieks, throwing Eridan out the window and hearing the shatter of glass. The psionic slides down the wall sobbing, putting his face in his hands and shaking from trying to keep himself together. It doesn't work and the scarlet and navy sparks just keep building around him, everything flying up and smashing into walls. A vase barely misses him, but he could give a shit less.

He knows there's no point in killing himself. You won't be waiting for him. Even that has been snatched from him. That's just his life, cruel and awful and painful beyond comprehending.

There is nothing Sollux wants to do more than cease existing like you did.
Last chapter, guys. And I ended it on a sad note. I am a horrible, awful person.

BUT REALLY, IF YOU ALL HADN'T TOLD ME YOU THOUGHT SOMETHING BAD WAS GOING TO HAPPEN, I WOULD HAVE BEEN NICE AND ENDED THIS HAPPILY. SO TRUTHFULLY, IT'S YOUR OWN FAULTS.

And of all my demon spirits, I need you the most;
I'm in love with your ghost...

That song would be Ghost by the Indigo Girls, which is what I was listening to when I wrote this. If you want to go listen to it, I can highly recommend it.

Aghhhhh I always forget to link the parts
Part 1 ==> gingerroot15.deviantart.com/ar...
Part 2 ==> gingerroot15.deviantart.com/ar...
Part 3 ==> gingerroot15.deviantart.com/ar...
Part 4 ==> gingerroot15.deviantart.com/ar...
Part 5 ==> gingerroot15.deviantart.com/ar...

Sollux ==> Hussie
You ==> Yourself
© 2013 - 2024 remembertheginger
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Xx-Karkat--Vantas-xX's avatar
Xx-Karkat--Vantas-xX
Oh.



I wasn't expecting that....